30th August - Winkfield Saracens 2-3 Winkfield

Finally a local match at Locks Ride. With wedding bells still ringing from the day before for a couple of players; Luke Carswell was missing again (this time due to the impending honeymoon), Mark Brown (right) was AWOL, probably still trying to find some rhythm on the dance floor from the night before.

John Callaway, sorry Tevez, returned from the gym (and soon gave away an early penalty, which was missed) accompanied by Barry. Injury listed Callum Whitty arrived with a walking stick - no real reason for it however. Also Adam Sharp had decided to cut back on his manhood so couldn't get onto the pitch.

Last minute additions were made to the squad, with Kyle, Scotty, Growler, Muzza and 20 rising from their sleepy states. However Dave Matthews (20) was still in a bad state, marking his territory with a line of sick. It remains to be seen whether Kyle will find the balls (to add to the schlong) and sign on or not.

Although Saracens were grateful for the extra bodies, the quality was not quite up to scratch. Muzza's crossfield pass fell straight to the feet of the opposition striker, he had plenty of time to score. Muzza then gave away a penalty, which they decided to score this time and he then gave the ball away for them to counter-attack and score. Thanks for coming...

There were two home goals to report. Scotty Williams slid the ball into an open net after a long ball from Callaway bounced through the defence. Barry then decided that he didn't need to protect his hair any longer and headed home from a corner. 2-3 loss the final result.

With the season getting closer it remains to be seen how many more additions to the squad manager Scott Bennison will be making. Keep an eye on the transfer deadline day live deals.

Scott did have a message for the fans, "a message to the best football fans in the world here, we need a 12th man, where are you? Let's be having you!". This message came after Bennison tried out a new 4-4-3 formation in the later part of the game.

If that wasn't enough to bring the fans down to Locks Ride, then maybe a picture of Lloyd Twyman (left) back in training would do it...here's hoping...